GREY:
"Who will it be? The forgotten and most boring contestant of all time
from our earliest season, or, the fan favorite from our most recent
season?"
GREY & KAITLIN:
"The Mole is......."
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"GOVERNOR DAVE BYRD!!!"
The Gov: "Gotta love the Guv!"
Linda: "Shockerrrrr....."
Maya: "Drats! I KNEW it too!"
Indigo: "Wowza!!"
Aiden: "I cun't believes it!"
Artie: "Bravo, Gouverneur."
The Gov: "Thank you everyone, now, drinks are on me!!"
GREY: "Actually, Governor, this is an alcohol-free zone--"
The Gov: "Ahhh SCREW your prohibition laws! No really, fuck 'em!
I
suppose this is as good a time as any, since I currently have your
attention: but this is my OFFICIAL announcement that me, the Governor
Byrd that you all know and love, is RUNNING FOR THE 2020 AMERICAN PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION!
That's right! I'm regaining my US citizenship and running for office
against that orange chimpanzee. And when I'm president, there will be
free scotch for all!!"
The
Gov: "Oh, and big congrats are in order for you, Ms. Harlow. I knew you
were going to be one of my greatest hurdles to maintaining my cover,
and I see you did not disappoint. Too bad there won't be another season
for you to pull off a hat trick!"
Kaitlin: "Thank you, Dave. I appreciate it. And yes, what a shame."
GREY: "And there you have it! The two big reveals of the night done and over with."
GREY: "But don't go away just yet! We still have much in store for ya, so stay tuned!"
The Gov: "Say, what becomes of that Fabby guy? Is he technically second place?"
GREY:
"Oh yeah, oops. Forgot about him.... as per usual. We'll talk about
placements soon! But we can just leave him in there for a bit. Not like
he has any fans excited to see him, ha!"
GREY:
"After the break, we'll see Kaitlin's road to victory, as well as
behind the scenes footage of the Gov's treacherous path to becoming one
of the most entertaining and notorious Moles this show has had!"
(a voice in the distance): "Hola!? Can someone let me out of here? ¡Estoy atrapado!
Hello? Someone, anyone!!?"
GREY (whispering): "Ignore that."
GREY: "....We'll be right back!!"
**********************************
**********************************
GREY: "Welcome back to the live series finale of THE MOLE!"
GREY: "Joined with us now is the entire final 3, including the Forgettable Fabio."
Fabio: "Not anymore, pendejo!"
GREY: "Alright! Posted on the screen behind me is the quiz scores and rankings throughout the season!"
GREY: "Not shown is Izzy, who somehow got cut off the screen.
She also got a score of 2 along with Shayne. Her top suspect was Indigo, then Linda, then Shayne."
She also got a score of 2 along with Shayne. Her top suspect was Indigo, then Linda, then Shayne."
GREY: "Right, so, a few interesting things to note!"
GREY:
"First off, many of the producers very early on expected Artie would
take this season, considering she was the only person to put the
Governor on the top of her ranking 3 times in a row; but when she was
executed, it suddenly opened up to be anyone's game!"
GREY:
"Then about halfway through, it was a close one between Maya, Tamela,
Taiha, and Kaitlin. All FOUR women had the Governor pinned from the very
start too!
Essentially, a woman was destined to win this season."
GREY:
"I personally expected Maya to pull it off, but then.... her confidence
faltered, and she erroneously started to suspect Kaitlin over the
Governor; which, as you'll see later, is thanks to both Kaitlin being
extra sus, and the Mole being extra sneaky!"
GREY: "So that left the race between just Taiha, Kaitlin, and Tamela, right....?"
GREY: "Wrong! Fabio had just entered the race too, and quite strongly at that!
His
social game was apparently better than Tamela's, as he was able to
correctly answer the security question that Tamela could not; quite
ironic, considering Tamela's background in hacking......
And the rest is history; Kaitlin vs Taiha vs Fabio."
GREY:
"Taiha, who claims she found a clue very early on, was expecting a
double-win. Unfortunately for her, she slipped up, answering 'Team Sky'
instead of 'Team Sea' for the last quiz, giving her a score of 19, and
that one mishap was enough to give her her first red screen during
tonight's live execution ceremony."
Taiha: "Cat-damn-it! Sea, sky, same thing! They're both places where kitties don't belong!!"
GREY:
"However.... Even if Taiha HAD gotten a perfect score, Kaitlin would
still have won, considering she knew the Mole for a longer and more
consistent period of time; she put the Governor on the top of her
ranking every single time, except for the second quiz."
GREY:
"Additionally, out of those 3, Kaitlin was also the most universally
suspicious to other players, indicating an even stronger game. On top of
that, she ALSO earned the most exemptions out of anyone this season,
with a total of FOUR exemptions."
TO BE CONTINUED....
